American Lifestyle:
Daughter: Sorry Dad, I got married yesterday. Forgot to invite you.
Dad: You naughty girl! It's OK but don't forget me next time!
Which is the most beautiful feeling in this world?
.
..
...
....
when you are trying to look at your friend; and you find that your friend
is already looking at you.
Location: Examination Hall
Ek bar santa church gaya....
Achanak light chali gayi aur andhera ho gaya...
Tabhi church ka ghanta baja"TONNN".
Santa chillaya- Ohh Teri UNDERTAKER aa gaya
Teacher: Gaali kya hai?
Student: Krodh ke smay mukh se nikle ashudh shabdon ka samuh
Jinke uchcharan ke paschat Vyakti ke hriday Ko ShantiKa anubhv hota hai.
Santa in Lift..
Girl : mehnga perfume laga k lift me ayi,
or
SANTA ko akad k boli Cobra perfume, Rs.6000..
2nd girl ayi : Jasmeen perfume"Rs.7000 ..
achanak lift ruk gayi or khuch smell aayi
dono ladkiyon ne apna naak pakda
Or
SANTA
ko dekhne Lagi..
SANTA with smile:- "Muli"14 Rupey Kilo..... Santa Madhosh \m/ ladkia
Behosh
Santa: Tu Office Me Sher Bankar Ghumta H,
Ghar Pe Tujhe Kya Ho Jata H?
Banta: Ghar pe bhi Sher Hi Hu,
Bas Upar 'Durga Ma' Sawaar Ho Jati H.
Different Girls fighting with their husbands:
.
Pilot's wife: ziyada uro mat samjhay!... .
Teachr's wife: Mujhey mat sikhao.
Ye aap ka School nahi
.
Dentist's wife: Daant tor k hath me day
dungi
.
Doctor's wife:
tabiyat durust kar dungi
.
BBA/MBA's wife: mind your own business,
.
Engineer wife: ziayda current na maro
.
Chartered Accountant 's
Wife: Pehlay Pass to ho lo phir baat
karna Budhaaaayyyy
Solid bezzati:
Boy: I lv u. I cnt live widout u.
Mar jaunga,
Mit jaunga,
Tere pyar me fana ho jaunga!!
.
.
.
.
.
Grl: Hmm. Dekhle tujhe jaise theek lage.
Sitting in a bar having drinks with Banta, Santa casually
pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar and said, "That's us
in ten years".
Banta glanced and replied, "That's mirror".
Santa: Oh! Deepshit!
Boy: I wanna be a superhero, guess my name?
Girl: Superman? Batman? Spiderman?
Boy: Your man.
Pappu: Will you go out with me?
Girl: No.
Pappu: Do you even know what I said?
Girl: Yes.
Pappu: What did I say then?
Girl: Will you go out with me?
Pappu: Sure.
Boyfriend and Girlfriend room mEin khamosh baithe they*
Gf ki soch :
1- Kyun ye mujhse baat ni kar raha?
2- Kya ye dusri ladki k barey me soch raha hai?
3- Kya ye kisi or ko chahta hai?
4- Kya isne mere chehre pe wrinkles dekhe hain?
5- Kya mai MOTI ho gai hun!
.
. .
.
Bf ki soch : ye Petrol
Kitna Mehanga Ho Gaya hai?
Banta: You are shivering. Are you feeling cold?
Santa: No, I'm on 'Vibrate' mode.
During a recent password audit, it was found that Santa
was using the following password on his office desktop system:
BittuPappuLuckyHappySonuPinkyRaniGuddi
Office Aministrator: Why such a long password?
Santa: Because the policy states that it has to be at least 8 characters long.
Girl: If we got married, stop smoking.
Boy: Ok!
Girl: Drinking too.
Boy: Ok!
Girl: N going to the night club too.
Boy:- Yes..
Girl:- What else can u leave??
Boy:- The idea of marrying You
Jo student top kre, wo "Student Of The Year"
aur jo student fail ho jaye wo "Student Of The Next Year";..
Think hatke - jiyo datke... || student/college jokes in hindi ||
1 Aadmi Ne Conductor Se Pucha:
Ap Kitne Ghante Bus Me Rhte Ho?
Jawab:
24 Ghante
Wo Kaise?
8 Ghante City Bus Me baki 16 Ghante BIWI K “basme.”
Wife :
It's my bad luck day I married you !
Otherwise
Lots of Smart Boys were interested in me :/
.
.
.
Husband :
Of course
they Must Be Smart :
thats whY they Escaped from You
Mareez- Dr. Sahab Mein boht khush rehta hoon,
Neend sukoon se aati hai,
Zindagi main Aman hi Aman hai,
Har kaam main Dil b Lagta hai,
Koi pareshani hi nahi.
Aisa kiyon hai ?
Doctor: Mein aap ki Bimari samajh gaya hoon.
Aap ki zindagi may
Vitamin "she' ki kami hai...
Jailer: Faasi se pehle kisse miloge?
Santa: Biwi Se
Jailer: Maa-Baap se nahi
Santa: Maa-Baap to agla jnm lete hi mil jyenge
biwi ke liye sala phir 25 saal wait karna padega!!
